A half-joking article from the Winnipeg Sun:
10. MARAT SAFIN
First of all, a warning: We’re not very good at judging guys by their looks. But Marat’s got a really hot girlfriend and there seems to be a lot of female bloggers out there who want him on their mixed doubles team. His sister, Dinara Safina, isn’t bad-looking, either.
9. Carling Bassett
Government regulations require us to include 10% Canadian content, and there’s no way Helen Kelesi was going to make this list. More cute than sexy, this little, blond-haired elf was all the rage among teenage boys in the ’80s. Remember Spring Fever? We’d like to see Anna Kournikova or Maria Sharapova try to star in their own teen sex movie. No, seriously … we’d like to see that.
8. RAFAEL NADAL
The big guns, the flowing locks, those Latin features — no wonder Rafa leaves teenage girls screaming in his wake. And don’t forget those crazy three-quarter-length pantaloons — the two-time French Open champ is responsible for the biggest fashion trend since the puffy shirt.
7. SANIA MIRZA
Breaking the tall, blonde and Russian mould, Mirza is a curvy 19-year-old from India. So what’s so special about her? Well, it’s been reported that an Islamic cleric in her home country issued a fatwa against her because of the revealing outfits she wears. Now if only someone would issue a fatwa against Rafael Nadal’s crazy shorts.
6. JIMMY CONNORS
Yes, we know — Jimbo had that that unfortunate Prince Valiant haircut. And his shorts were too short and too tight. And he was a bit of a momma’s boy. But he dated Chris Evert and later married a Playboy Playmate. So that has to count for something, right? Look — we already told you we’re no good at this.
5. JELENA DOKIC
Samson had his hair, Jelena Dokic had her mole. Ever since having a beauty spot removed from her upper lip, this Serbian-born player has plummeted in the world rankings. Never mind — she still looks good, except for that bizarre grimace she makes when she’s about to hit the ball.
4. GABRIELA SABATINI
We miss Gaby. Not only was this Argentinian beauty a stunner on the court, but she had the game to back up all those magazine covers and endorsement deals. She won 27 singles titles, including the 1990 U.S. Open, and captured silver in the 1988 Olympics. And that one-handed backhand was downright sexy.
3. TOMMY HAAS
Another guy with a really hot girlfriend. And he’s another fashion icon, having launched a crusade to get Wimbledon to allow men to wear sleeveless shirts. Better yet, he’s kind of a bad boy, having lambasted former player Jim Courier for having “his tongue up” a certain part of Roger Federer’s anatomy earlier this year.
2. MARIA SHARAPOVA
When she won Wimbledon a couple of years ago, the world suddenly took notice. A blonde, 6-foot-2, 19-year-old with the talent to win Grand Slams is a marketer’s dream. And those high-pitched grunts when she hits the ball sound so much better than they did coming out of Monica Seles.
1. ANNA KOURNIKOVA
Surprise, surprise. If you’ve been reading the Sun for the past decade or so, you know how much we like Anna. Despite the fact that she’s been retired for three years, we still seem to print photos of her whenever she picks up a racquet. And contrary to popular opinion, Anna was not the world’s worst professional tennis player. She was one of the best doubles players in the world, teaming up with Martina Hingis to win the Australian Open twice. Her singles record? Never mind. Winnipeg Sun